olde_fashioned: (JA -- MP -- Fanny)
[personal profile] olde_fashioned
I have just finished watching ITV's skeleton of Jane Austen's Mansfield Park. I am most seriously displeased. I am now going to bring out my sarcastic weapons without any apologetic restraints and wield them with utter ferocity in the general direction of whoever is responsible of ruining this story. Do not read this tirade review if you are an ardent fan of this movie. (although I do not see how any could exist, haha) They seem to have kept the names and changed the rest. Why bother to adapt something if you're not going to tell the story properly???? Grrrrrrr…

I knew I would not like Billie Piper the moment the cast list was released and I saw her picture. Without seeming to “judge a book by its cover” she is not at all period-looking or suitably “meek” or sweet or downtrodden enough to play Fanny Price. At least Jane Austen’s Fanny, that is. I was left with the distinct impression that somewhere along the line, PBS was given the wrong tape and we were subjected to some non-Austen contraption designed to torture and confuse the viewer.

What was with the HAIR in this movie? Fanny has a bleach job (and a bad one at that!) while Tom and Henry looked like something a cat would drag in. Edmund’s hair was plastered to his head like he hadn’t taken a bath in weeks. And makeup? Lipstick?? *fans self*



Was Billie Piper’s idea of showing Fanny’s goodness and sweetness to run around all the time falling out of her dress, flailing her arms about like a crazy woman who thinks she was a chicken in another life? And that wheezing laugh of hers. Is that supposed to be endearing and sympathetic?? Where is Fanny’s heart? Her inner struggles, her moral convictions, her desire to be good, honest, and truthful? There was no emotion at all, and there was no drama -- unless you count confusion! I am so grateful that I had HAPPENED TO READ THE BOOK so that I knew what the heck was going on. I think the filmmakers were even more confused than their audience, sadly. Tom declares that “Fanny is the best girl alive” but what makes her so? There is nothing in the movie to indicate anything other than she likes running around with her mouth open, and watching people behind curtains. The latter worked for Colin Firth as Darcy, but I have yet to see anyone pull off the former with any success.

We were never given a clear reason of why Fanny dislikes Henry so much, other than his previous attentions to Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee. (whoops, sorry -- I meant Maria and Julia). We don’t even know in a timely manner about Maria’s sin, or at all about Julia’s elopement, and how “Maria’s guilt induced Julia’s folly.” We are never allowed the crucial visit to Portsmouth where Henry goes and visits Fanny. We never even see Mr. Price and the rest of Fanny’s family.

The dancing scene for Fanny’s birthday was frustrating! The Waltz is not period correct! Gahh!!! I guess ITV didn’t want to go to all the added expense of fitting up a ballroom for a proper Regency ball since they spent all of their budget on getting period-correct hairstyles. I suppose they thought we, the ignorant audience, would enjoy a springtime frolic out on the grass where all the servants gather to gawk? The Bertrams have holdings in Antigua, and yet they cannot afford more than one measly fiddler to play music. The request of the song Portsmouth was an interesting choice, because of Fanny, but it is not the Portsmouth I am familiar with on my English Country Dancing CD. But perhaps there are two different versions. I really thought we might get a nice dance with candlelight and Tom getting away from his aunt’s card table and seeing Fanny’s “glossy spot” dress but alas, we are doomed to have a picnic.

The only thing I liked was the casting of Edmund, which surprised even myself. I thought he did a good job with what he was given, and in portraying Edmund in a less-than-clueless way. I think the character of Edmund would be easy to screw up. Did anyone else think the actor’s voice sounded like Paul Bettany’s? (oooh, there’s an idea. Stephen Maturin in a Jane Austen movie! Why not? We already got Mr. Pullings and Worley. hee hee. Anyone with the last name of “D‘Arcy“ simply HAS to be in a JA adaptation at least once…)

Speaking of which, what is wrong with a little RESEARCH???? William wasn’t allowed to wear his uniform when not on duty!!! It was all over the novel! (note to ITV filmmakers: there is this nice book called “Mansfield Park” -- you might not have heard of it, but you really should make an effort to read it sometime)

Mary Crawford was tolerable, I suppose, but only because everyone else was so bad! Was she trying to hitch-hike and get a ride from Edmund by showing her leg like that??? (my initial reaction was that she was a prostitute, and if I did not know the story in advance, I would have believed that throughout the duration of the film) Maybe that was how she was asking him to take her riding, because the first clue we get of that is seeing her perched atop a horse, YET AGAIN clad in red. I think the costumers believe that stupid, age-old cliché that only bad women wear red, and lots of it. Hmph. I was amusing myself by trying to decide who was showing more cleavage, Fanny or Mary. *snort*

Mrs. Norris? Hellooooo she was the evil stepmother aunt! Where was all of her abuse of Fanny? Where was her evil, cruel, devastating remarks to Fanny about her being undeserving? Where was her preferential treatment of Maria? Where was her matchmaking with the aforementioned spoiled brat and The Idiotic Dolt aka Mr. Rushworth? (I also thought she was too young, but that is just a personal preference.)

The music was a strange combination of I-don’t-know-what with an almost comedic element to it. I felt like I was supposed to seeing something funny or witty before me, when all I saw was a random selection of Cliff’s Notes: The Mansfield Park Edition. Poor Jane is probably rolling over in her grave. Either that or laughing her head off at ITV.

Oh yes! I almost forgot. The most flawless element in the entire film? The brilliantly inspired and truly moving performance of Pug.

Date: 2008-01-28 11:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] midenianscholar.livejournal.com
Okay. Well. I forgot it was on, and my mom remembered during the last half hour (or so I thought), and by then I figured it wasn't worth trying to catch. I forgot it's on till 9:30. Oh well. I went a few times, but my impressions were: Edmund has very large eyes. Fanny has very big pink lips. Um. She runs like she's about to trip. *leaves**enters at the very end* Oh, yay, they're together. What's with the dancing? Why is the camera trying to smoosh into their faces? Why are they dancing without music? *the end*

Anyway. Looks like I didn't miss once. I'm going to see about finding it at the library/YouTube, just for kicks.

I didn't like the actress as Rose in Doctor Who--which I've mentioned before. She isn't really bad, but she sort of plays the dumb blond. I didn't really understand why the Doctor was so devastated when she was gone.

I am somewhat curious to read the book, though, because I watched the 1999 version (I think it was) and really did like it. But some of your commenters are saying it was creepy compared to the book. So maybe I can suck it up and get through the book. Oi vey.

P.S. You make me laugh.

P.P.S. I thought that this was produced by BBC and then transfered over to Masterpiece and whatnot? But everyone else is blaming ITV. *confusion*

P.P.P.S. I don't have high hopes for the Jane Austen film next week. "Austen Regrets"? It sounds like an angst teenager.
Edited Date: 2008-01-28 11:31 pm (UTC)

Date: 2008-01-29 05:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] olde-fashioned.livejournal.com
I almost forgot, too! It was like 5 'till nine and I almost freaked. ;-)

Fanny had very big lips? That's all you noticed? *snort*

Maybe Netflix would have it? *shrug* That is if you want to waste your slot on such garbage. Ha ha.

I didn't get the impression that Billie Piper was bad, just badly cast. Also I think she had no clue what the character of Fanny was about.

The version with Justine Waddell who plays Molly Gibson?

P.S. Thank you veddy much madam! *swoops hat and bows low* That was my intention! :-D I love to make people laugh.

P.P.S. No. This is made by another network (ITV) not the BBC. PBS/Masterpiece-formerly-Theatre buys the rights for those of us across the pond. They are only the distributors. That's like having CBS buy the rights to Doctor Who and having them show it on their stations even though they didn't make it. Does that help?

P.P.P.S. I kinda do. I liked Olivia Williams in Emma, and as I might have said before I have always thought she would make a good Jane Austen. Imagine my delight in hearing she had actually been cast! But I think it'll end up being the BBC's answer to Becoming Jane, unfortunately. :-(

Date: 2008-01-29 02:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] midenianscholar.livejournal.com
Haha.

Well, I couldn't stay to notice much more. She didn't seem (from the five minutes I saw) to really butcher the part. She mostly was just way out of place, and not very good at doing something other than being a little pouty.

Garbage is one of the funnest things to watch. (One Night With the King, anyone?)

Probably she didn't. Alas.

Yes, that's the one.

P.S. Ditto.

P.P.S. Okay. Yes. I see things clearly now. I hope that the director of S&S (consequently, of my own P&P) does a good job. Perhaps he'll bring some of his (her?) higher forms of learning from being in a Real Production to the little screen.

P.P.P.S. I don't really have bad hopes for it. But I just hope it's not Jane Austen pining over her love life. That's sort of what it sounds like. (Have you seen Becoming Jane yet?)

Date: 2008-01-29 10:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] olde-fashioned.livejournal.com
Yes. Out of place, indeed. In the superlative form!

I haven't seen that! My dad wanted to rent it and I had to explain that I do not want to watch it without actually having any valid reason why, other than that I hate Bible movies because they always screw it up and I think that's blasphemy. So was it horrid?

P.P.S. Joe Wright directed the new Davies S&S?? Now I'm confused. (btw -- did you know he's engaged to the beautiful and elegant Rosamund Pike/Jane Bennet from P&P3?????)

P.P.P.S. No, I have not. I'm waiting for Netflix to ship it next month.

Date: 2008-01-29 11:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] midenianscholar.livejournal.com
What was killing about it is that they had the funds to get really good costumes, decent cameras, decent actors, and good sets, and they murdered it. I highly recommend this movie for the days you hate life and want to be very critical of something. For instance: Every time something Very Important happens, we get to see it in at least three different shots, from three different angles, with a drum going, "BOM, BOM, BOM" for each shot. Then there's the time the king catches a sword (which was going to chop off her head!) in his bare hand and only gets a little scratch. I could go on for ages. What drives me insane is that Christians love this movie and think it's great! I was studying the book of Esther, and I looked up some things to see if it was even in the Bible, and it wasn't! Then we did a Sunday School lesson on Esther, and we just watched the movie, and the teacher was really, really impressing on us this one plot point, which isn't in the Bible. I wanted to go, "Uh, sorry, Mr. Alan, but that's wrong." But since his whole thesis was from this point, I did not want to totally embarrass him. But I nearly died during the whole movie, and was shaking with the effort not to laugh. Laura was patting me, and then at the part where he catches the sword (which she hates, being a sword freak), she exclaimed, "HA!" really, really loudly by accident. [/long ramble]

P.P.S. Wait, wait. No. I don't know. I thought you told me that. Now I'm confused. (Ooooooh. That's interesting.

Date: 2008-01-30 08:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] olde-fashioned.livejournal.com
Oh sheesh. Thanks for the info because now I have no curiosity WHATSOEVER!! *ahem* I've seen so many Bible movies that make me want to throw things at the screen they're so bad. The only one I don't hate is Joseph, with Ben Kingsley.

Gosh, my hat's off to you! I would have not been able to keep quiet about something the teacher thought was in the Bible but wasn't. I might have sweetly asked him for the verse reference and then watched as he struggled to find it. *pause* But is that wicked? Esther (and Ruth) were always my favourite books of the Bible for as long as I can remember.

I do that! I feel almost morally obligated to blurt out in a "quiet" part so as not to disrupt the dialogue, "That's not accurate!!" so as to be sure to enlighten the rest of the audience. ;-)

P.P.S. I'm going to look it up. *IMDb* Nope. A John Alexander, whoever the heck that is. I'm not sure what to think of her marrying him -- other than I think she's too pretty for him. ;-) (mean, I know!)

Date: 2008-01-30 04:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] midenianscholar.livejournal.com
The only reason to see it is to make fun of it. I think I've seen that Joseph one, a looong time ago.

I don't think it's wrong to correct a teacher. I really wanted one of the teachers who studied Esther with me to say something, because it didn't feel right for me to correct him in front of the whole youth group. I meant to tell him afterwards, but I never got around to it. (Esther and Ruth are my favorites, too. Particularly Ruth.)

I do that quite freely at home. It drives my older sister nuts.

P.P.S. Drat. Well, I'll try to hold out for it anyhow.

Date: 2008-01-30 10:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] olde-fashioned.livejournal.com
LOL!!

I think it's a awesome (and I don't mean "cool") responsibility to have, teaching God's word, so if it were me I would try to get it right!! I wonder what God would think of that, confusing the Bible with some movie? 8-/

So do I! And it drives my mom nuts, but she's used to me. ;-D

Date: 2008-01-30 10:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] midenianscholar.livejournal.com
:D

I agree. I've taught a few times...very scary, but fun.

So is my mom and Laura. It drives me nuts when I drive people nuts by edifying them. I can't watch any Austen movies with my older sister anymore because she goes crazy when I give comments. Plus she thought my P&P ('05) was stupid. Not a good thing to say to me when I've invited her into my happy place. *pout*
Edited Date: 2008-01-30 10:34 pm (UTC)

Date: 2008-01-31 06:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] olde-fashioned.livejournal.com
You've taught? Yet another thing to amaze me.

That wasn't very nice. I'm sorry. You know P&P'05 is not my favourite adaptation but even I don't think it's stupid! But then I'm sure big sisters sound meaner than they intend to, and this is my experience/conscience speaking this time. :-/

Date: 2008-01-31 03:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] midenianscholar.livejournal.com
Oh, it isn't amazing. The only reason I was able to do it was because something would be pressed on my heart, and I'd write a lesson, and I'd bug the teachers till they let me.

I know, being an older sister myself. It just would frustrate me that Amy would be bugging us all to spend time with her one minute, and then being critical or seeming not to care the next. Even though I know she loves us and all, she does not always look around and consider what response would be the best. You know? (Though she travels more than she is at home--she is a midwife in a country that needs a clean place to have babies--so I don't know that she can completely come home for a few weeks and fit in perfectly.)

Date: 2008-02-01 07:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] olde-fashioned.livejournal.com
Speaking makes me nervous.

Well, speaking from my own POV, I don't always know when I'm being not nice. Especially if I get tired or preoccupied about something else, or is someone's being particularly irritating that day.

How old is Amy?

Date: 2008-02-01 10:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] midenianscholar.livejournal.com
I have to have my lessons memorized. Otherwise I stutter and trip a bit. But when I get something down and am in my zone, I do pretty well.

Yes, that's what I suspect happens. That's why I give her grace. (Well, and because she's my sister, and because the Bible says too. *holy hallow*

30.

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